“Why me?”: Transforming from Victim to Survivor

Highest Standards, Nationally Recognized:

man conquering mountain

As young woman explained her story on The Guardian:

“Not every sad story has a tragic ending. Looking at the statistics, you might think I should be dead. My sad story includes a beginning that was riddled with family dysfunction including domestic violence, neglect, sexual abuse and exploitation. This traumatic upbringing was followed by drug abuse and forced prostitution. And yet here I am today, a sober, emancipated, successful and happy woman.

Whether you’ve gone through traumatic events, a mental illness, or substance abuse, recovery can be challenging. We may feel sorry for ourselves – if we could go back in time, maybe we could do something different. We may ponder the reality of our current situation and feel upset by how we got here. However, moving past those feelings and entering a state of strength, hope, growth, endurance, and determination is what can propel us to the place we really want to be. The Florida Council Against Sexual Violence explains the stages of healing that we experience after traumatic events have occurred:

  1. Crisis Response – this happens from several days to several weeks after the traumatic incident. Most people exhibit either expressed or controlled symptoms, and here are some of the most common reactions: bodily reactions such as injury or pregnancy, emotional responses such as shock or disbelief, behavior changes such as crying or laughing, environmental changes such as more stress by children or other life demands, intimacy issues, family problems such as control and revenge, or spirituality challenges such as contemplating “why me?” or struggling with a higher power.
  2. Reorganization/Disorganization – after some time has passed, the person may begin to realize that their life has changed forever. They may have unexpressed issues, and they may still experience things like flashbacks, vulnerability, low self-esteem, self-blame, crowd avoidance, self-endangerment, and may have thoughts about karma or good vs. evil.
  3. Healing – this phase is non-linear, and can take an entire lifetime to reach if needed. A person who reaches this may give themselves permission to experience physical or emotional reactions; they may have developed a tool box for positive healing strategies, and they may be more open and ready to talk about their experiences to help others.

Healing is supposed to happen on your own time, and when you are ready. Seeking treatment can be an excellent step towards helping you regain control back over your life.




If you’re seeking a mental health and/or substance abuse recovery treatment center, call us today at 888-958-7511. Avalon Malibu is a world-renowned, California state-licensed treatment center with licensed, experienced professionals who care about your recovery. We have a variety of methods that we can try with you to see what works and will help you develop a customized treatment plan to best suit your needs. Make the decision to place your health and happiness as top priority, and call us for a consultation.

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