Breakups are always difficult, but if you identify with being in a codependent relationship, a breakup can feel catastrophic. Getting out of a codependent relationship is a big step since you are finally stepping away from a toxic relationship that was fueling your dysfunctional behavior and fears. Taking a leap of faith and getting out of that codependent relationship is challenging but worth the effort.
What Makes Getting Out of a Codependent Relationship So Hard?
The common traits that people involved in codependency often share are what make it so difficult for them to get out of their relationship. Their frequent people-pleasing tendencies need for validation, avoidance of rejection, and denial of their feelings are all examples of how they convince themselves to stay in the relationship. So much of your purpose and time is wrapped up in the other person’s wants and needs. In the process, you lose some of yourself. Getting out of a codependent relationship seems scary because of the loneliness and loss of identity that would result if you leave.
Easing Your Way Out of Codependency
- Focus on yourself – Allow yourself the space to put your needs and interests first and no longer give all of your attention and care to your other half. You should focus on self-development, being content by yourself, and genuinely taking good care of yourself.
- Find support in the right places – Who has been telling you that your codependent partner was never right for you? Lean on your family, friends, and any loved ones who truly want the best for you. Go to therapy for guidance and to help work through your codependency tendencies or find a support group like Codependents Anonymous.
- Get realistic – Set healthy boundaries with your ex and begin to understand the reality of your relationship, being cautious not to solely focus on the good times or sugar-coating over the toxic elements of the relationship.
Leaving a codependent relationship is hard to do but offers someone an opportunity for self-healing if they take the time to do the inner work and address their codependent tendencies. Overcoming codependency is possible, especially with the right help. At Avalon Malibu, we specialize in treating substance abuse and co-occurring mental health disorders. We are passionate about providing our clients with the support they need and finding a treatment that will help them lead happier, more balanced lives. For more information on how we may help you achieve your goals, call us at (844) 857-5992.