Letting Go of Perfectionism

Highest Standards, Nationally Recognized:

Perfectionism, Externalize

Perfectionism is an insidious force that makes one believe that they — and others — can achieve perfection. A perfectionist may even understand that perfectionism is an illusion, yet they still cannot let that notion go.

Learning how to remove the need to always be or appear perfect can have a powerful effect on your life. Here are some tips that can assist you.

Be Aware

Reflect on why the need to be — or appear to be — perfect is there in the first place. Having an awareness of your perfectionism is the first step toward changing this aspect of your life.

When, where, and how does perfectionism show up the most for you? Are there certain thoughts, situations, people, or events that cause it to surface?

Practicing mindful, curious, and non-judgmental awareness about yourself can allow you to have self-acceptance and self-compassion — especially when you find yourself stuck in certain thought patterns.


Over-identifying with self-judgemental aspects of yourself can keep you stuck in them. While perfectionism may be a part of you, it is not the complete you, nor is it the true you.

Externalizing your behavior patterns related to perfectionism allows you to separate yourself from the all-or-nothing nature of it. Doing this will help you remember who you are — beyond the self-critical thoughts and unrealistic expectations you have been enduring.

Remember Yourself

By practicing the tips above, you can let go of your perfectionist tendencies so that they no longer rule your life.

Remembering and getting in touch with your true self —  behind the mask of perfectionism — allows you to be open and curious with yourself. To do this, try asking yourself questions such as:

  • “Who would I be without the pressure to always be perfect?”
  • “What could I do if I wasn’t always so self-critical?”
  • “How would I feel about myself if I didn’t have unrealistically high expectations?”

You may want guidance in the process of discovering your answers to these questions. Mental health therapy, where you will be supported each step of the way in a healthy environment and with therapists who are excited to guide you, can help you to achieve this.

Perfectionism can feel overwhelming and self-defeating at times. At Avalon Malibu, we recognize how prevalent and anxiety-ridden the pressure to be perfect is and are here to support you in stepping out of perfectionistic tendencies. Whether it is through cultivating awareness of or externalizing perfectionist behaviors, or supporting you as you remember your true self, we can help. You will also be among professionals and peers that support a safe and secure environment. To learn more, call us today at (844) 857-5992

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