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With the holidays coming up, it can be easy to feel nervous about the urge to abuse alcohol or drugs. Whether potential usage is with family or friends, or whether we may feel lonely during the holidays, the urge is still there, and it’s real. If you’ve been in recovery for quite some time or if you’re just wanting to ensure your health and safety this holiday season, sobriety can easily be achieved by remembering and following these few simple tips:

“We do not heal the past by dwelling there; we heal the past by living fully in the present.” – Marianne Williamson Letting go of the past can be very hard to do. Complex situations of the past can creep into every nook and cranny of space in our minds, filling every subconscious thought or decision we make. Dr. Judith Sills states, “It is heart-stoppingly easy to get stuck in the darkness of bad memories. They are emotional quicksand and exert a strong downward pull on the psyche.” We often have an urge to go back and right the wrongs, do things differently, say something else – anything to change the outcome of a situation that hurt us badly. These memories can plague us and leave us feeling exhausted. Letting go of the chains of the past means giving freedom to ourselves both in the present and future. Dr. John Grohol, founder and CEO of Psych Central, has provided several steps for letting go of the past:

When it comes to recovery, finding healthy outlets is key. Recovery is a time for growing, learning, and bettering ourselves. A time where we can focus on how our mental illness or addiction affects us and others – and during recovery we develop tools so overcome our addiction or tools to better work with symptoms of a mental illness. These tools are incredibly important – we take them day by day, and over time we transform.

When we only see our friends on the weekends, or a few times a month, it can be hard to tell what they are going through. Sometimes people don’t always tell us their struggles and if something upsetting has recently occurred in their life and we aren’t made aware, our friend may be in more danger of developing an addiction, especially if they feel they do not have an outlet. According to MentalHelp.net, the following are signs to tell if your friend has an addiction problem: Behavioral signs:

An excerpt from Tom Shachtman’s book titled, To Be or Not To Be Amish: Once the young ladies hit the cars, and the cars have pulled away from the homestead, appearances and behaviors begin to change. While riding along, each Amish girl performs at least one of many actions that have been forbidden to her throughout her childhood: lights up a cigarette, grabs a beer, switches on the rock and rap music on the car radio or CD player, converses loudly and in a flirtatious manner with members of the opposite sex. Leanne, a character from “Orange is the New Black”, grew up in an Amish community and started using meth during her Rumspringa. Outside of her character, this issue is a major concern in the United States today. According to Amish America, Rumspringa or “running around” is “a term used to describe the period of adolescence Amish experience starting at around age 16. Rumspringa seems to have caused an epidemic of addiction among the Amish community; last year, approximately 70 people – many of them youth – were arrested at an Amish party. Fox 59 reported more than 1000 people were expected to attend from Ohio and the Interstate before the party was shut down. Addiction does not discriminate. Individuals of the Amish community face the same demons the rest of us face, including addiction. According to NPR.org, Rumspringa is a time where adolescents of the Amish community can “test” out the modern world to determine if they would like to continue their path within the community. At age 16, the adolescents have not yet been baptized, so they are not officially considered members of the church yet. Many youths are encouraged to explore movie theatres, driving, malls and more – but some, with this feeling of freedom, take part in unhealthy behaviors that lead to addiction. Alcoholism, meth, heroin, and opioid addiction all impact the Amish community, just like any other community. The dangers are ever more real to Amish youth because, with this form of freedom, they are likely to take drastic action in a similar fashion people first entering college might take. At any age and in any community, addiction can occur.

Whether you’re hosting, attending, or neither, the holidays can bring about stress. Pressures of cooking the best meal, putting your “best foot forward” when talking to friends or family you haven’t seen in a long time, and managing the holidays alone can all be stressful and anxiety- inducing. With the right mindset however, anxiety and stress does not have to be a part of your holiday. Here are several wonderful tips for handling anxiety during the holidays:

Many famous people have been known to have mental illnesses ranging from anxiety and depression to bipolar disorder or schizophrenia. According to Odyssey Online, several key historical figures have been known to have a mental illness:

Suspended receiver Josh Gordon of the Cleveland Browns has struggled with addiction for several years, missing many games and nearly all a season in 2015 due to substance abuse. On a video released, Gordon stated, “I’ve used alcohol on many, many occasions. Xanax on many occasions, cocaine several occasions, marijuana most of my life, codeine, cough syrup. Methazine is very prevalent where I'm from. It's what I grew up using." When Gordon left in mid to late October of 2016, he moved to Gainesville, Florida and got into “probably the best shape of my life.” A candid interview with GQ showed Gordon’s true thoughts about himself, addiction, and his recovery. When asked how he felt about recovery now compared to previous attempts, Gordon stated that before, he was thinking to himself, “If I plan on having any type of career, I’ll stop”, but now he is thinking to himself, “If I want any type of a life, if I wanted to live, I’ll stop.” Gordon exclaimed that his perspective changed when he started realizing the reality: that his addiction was leading him to his death and that if he truly wanted to life, he needed to do something about it. Dr. Stephen Diamond, licensed clinical and forensic psychologist, told Psychology Today, “in some ways, addiction is an extreme example of an existential challenge we all wrestle with every day: accepting reality as it is.” Josh Gordon’s previous beliefs of himself and his addiction may have held him back from truly changing his life; it wasn’t until he faced his reality that he had a clearer view of what he needed to do next. ESPN noted that Gordon had been given a year-long suspension for the 2015 season because he had four drinks on a plane. Gordon stated in a video, “I’ve been enabled most of my life, honestly. I’ve been enabled by coaches, teachers, professors, everybody pretty much gave me a second chance because of my ability.” Psych Central defines enabling as “removing the natural consequences to the addict of his or her behavior.” Enabling perpetuates addiction and shows the person there is nothing wrong or their behavior is “okay”. Many people, especially athletes and other highly-recognized individuals, may become enabled because their friends, family, and authority figures do not feel comfortable “standing up to” or “confronting” the person, although this is what they really need.

When first learning of your loved one’s illness, it may feel easy to become panicked, overwhelmed, and confused. Do things change now? How am I supposed to navigate our relationship? These questions are normal and valid – we want to be there for our loved ones, but we may not understand everything they are going through. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) recognizes that mental illness does not only impact the one involved – it affects friends, teachers, neighbors, coworkers, family members, and others in the community. MentalHealth.gov states that learning about mental health issues can lead to earlier treatment of your loved one, improved recognition of signs or symptoms, and great understanding and compassion. The American Psychological Association (APA) has noted that many people with mental illness experience social withdrawal, difficulty functioning at school and work, problems with memory and thinking, feeling disconnected from reality, changes in eat, sleep, and hygiene habits, substance abuse, mood changes, and suicidal thoughts. While these may seem like terrifying symptoms, supporting your loved one fully can help reduce these. Psychology Today has provided several ways that you can support your loved one:

Along with the holidays comes planning, cooking, gift-buying, decorating, family-gathering, talking, driving, and much more. Many aspects of the holidays can be stressful; if you’ve recently lost a loved one or have disconnected from family, it can add even more stress. Mindfulness is a wonderful technique that can help you stay grounded, focused, and relaxed. Mindfulness is, “the process of bringing one’s attention to experiences occurring in the present moment.” The practice of mindfulness is important for day-to-day living, but can be very crucial throughout the holidays as well. The following are tips for practicing mindfulness this holiday season:

Many of us have friends, family, or extended family who have gone through addiction. According to the National Survey on Drug Use and Health, 23.5 million Americans aged 12 or older needed treatment for an illicit drug or alcohol abuse problem. When family members have an addiction, their attitude and behavior changes. This, in turn, changes the equilibrium within the household – whether it is spoken or unspoken. Psychology Today notes that patterns of interactions between family members may include how feelings are expressed (or not), how conflict is managed (or avoided), how family issues are communicated in the world outside of the family system, what roles each family member is assigned to, and more. These patterns impact every member of the family, leading some to adopt negative patterns of behavior, continuing the negative cycle of addiction. Luckily, this doesn’t have to be true. The National Association for Children of Addiction states that recovery and even abstinence is possible – you can break the cycle. Tim Sanford of boundless.org, author and licensed professional counselor with over 20 years of experience as a clinician, has provided several key steps to breaking the family cycle of addiction, or even dysfunction.

Celebrities serve as key figures in the public eye – most people are watching their every move. When a celebrity becomes addicted to something, many people do not learn of this addiction until later. In recent past, we have seen famous people such as Amy Winehouse, Charlie Sheen, Whitney Houston, Heath Ledger, Lindsay Lohan, Robert Downey Jr., and more fall into addiction and even worse – death. What most people tend to think is, ‘How can these celebrities do this? They make so much money, they are so famous – they have everything they could ever want!’ Contrary to widespread belief, celebrities have different influences and factors that lead them to addiction. John Tsilimparis told the Huffington Post in 2013 that many celebrities are “under watch” 24/7, and trying to maintain a “perfect” image and keep up their success may prove too much to handle. Thus, many stars turn to drugs or alcohol to cope with the overwhelming amount of pressure they are experiencing. ABC News notes that drugs often allow people to escape their reality or deal with the high demand and stress that many celebrities face. Many people that work and befriend celebrities also encourage them to use – Fox News reported that some club owners will even “pay” celebrities with drugs to entice them to check out their venue. Parties are a common aspect of celebrity life, and with many people wanting to be friends with a celebrity, they often get what they want. In addition, celebrities who are in the acting world often get injured on set; to recover as quickly as possible, they may be given painkillers. With the current opioid epidemic that we are facing today, this can easily become an addiction. Alcohol Rehab claims that many celebrities have been using drugs since before they became famous, and many of them are considered high-functioning. Kirsten McGuiness wrote an article for the Huffington Post explaining that people with a high functioning addiction set limits for themselves but inevitably go over them. Celebrities who are high-functioning may appear to be happy, healthy, and successful but may be harboring an addiction secret. Just because a celebrity can maintain their home and family for the meantime, however, doesn’t mean they’re safe. As a person becomes more dependent on their addiction, it slowly begins to take over their lives – even if that first sign is their appearance, or if they slowly start failing to meet their obligations.