Recovery

Acceptance is a part of the 12-step program, and we hear "acceptance is the answer" in meetings all the time. However, acceptance is not just the illusion of not caring.

Different types of therapy are available to patients with mental illness, especially in the 21st century. Psychodynamic therapy is one of the three main types of treatment in combating depression. The other two are cognitive behavioral therapy and interpersonal therapy. Psychodynamic therapy is the type of treatment most people visualize when they think of how a psychologist treats patients. It is designed to help patients experience their full range of emotions. In particular, the goal is to access feelings that a patient is not aware of. Professionals accomplish this goal by accessing the unconscious part of patients' lives. This helps people understand why their mood and behavior become affected by unconscious feelings they are not aware of.

Insomnia or difficulty with sleep can affect the body dramatically. It is common to experience irregular sleeping patterns as a symptom when an individual suffers from mental health disorders or trauma. The inability to get good sleep can lead to a decline in physical health and mental health.

In the 12-step fellowship-based programs that exist today, there is an important step that we must continuously practice. As people who suffer from substance use disorder, we have done a lot of things we are not proud of. We may have stolen from people because we needed alcohol and drugs to get "well." We reacted and fought people. We burned bridges. We hurt those around us that we loved the most. We did things we now feel shame about. What we must remember is that we are not those people. That was our disorder in action. We did most of those things under the influence of mind-altering substances. We avoided creditors and did whatever we needed to do to get what we needed. We are not bad people, we were just sick. In the 12 steps, steps eight and nine are all about amending past behaviors. We may feel afraid when we think of confronting these things or feel excited to amend things right away. It is important to remember that seven vital steps come before the amends step. The steps are in order for a reason, and by the time you reach steps eight and nine, you will be ready for them. We must get a sponsor to guide us through these steps because sometimes there are amends we should not make conventionally. We have to be careful about what is revealed during the amends process. In some cases, if a person does not know, it is in their best interest that we do not tell them. It is not fair to tell someone something because of our own guilt. Instead, it is usually suggested that we make amends in a different way. This is where having a sponsor is especially important. It is necessary to remember that when we make amends, we are admitting our wrongs. This means we continuously attempt to correct our behavior and strive for better attitudes and actions. The freedom that comes with making amends is incredible. It may seem scary at first; however, it is worthwhile. We found that we were able to mend relationships we thought we would never have again. Our relationships with our friends and families blossomed, and we found a new peace we had never experienced before.

From the time that we are small children, we are typically raised to look at the bright side or silver lining. We are told to rejoice in optimism when something goes wrong. Mentors explain that adversity is a teacher, and we should look for the lesson when it feels like the world is dark. That is helpful, of course. However, researchers have recently found that rushing to this positive narrative can leave no space to feel the necessary feelings. This useful practice can turn into quick avoidance. If we start to compartmentalize experiences, we are setting ourselves up for pain. The more we disregard our feelings, the more we will run into huge problems. That is, we will shove our emotions deep down, yet they will come out in other areas of our lives. Not being okay is actually okay and sometimes necessary for growth. If you have started therapy, understand that it is a lifelong process. That doesn't mean it will take a lifetime to heal, it just means that it will take time. The lessons we create end up replacing the actual learning. What we do is we end up with a fake system of feeling better. Someone asks us if we're okay, and we respond affirmatively even if it's not true. It is not helpful to stay in that mindset. We must step away from this and allow it to be acceptable for everyone that it is okay to not be okay. When you start this healing journey, it is essential to stop and take a break if it gets too overwhelming. If you don't give yourself space to rest, you may feel like your emotions are too much to bear. Before you know it, you're back to avoiding it entirely. If you know someone is struggling, you must reach out to them and see how you can be helpful. When doing so, make sure to remain sympathetic and avoid forcing anyone to open up about what they are struggling with. If you put pressure on someone to open up, they will feel attacked and not supported. Instead of opening up, they will shut themselves away.

Its our natural instinct to act selfish and think about our self interests first. There was a speech that was recently made by a famous psychiatrist named Karl Menninger where he explained to an audience member that had asked him how to handle someone with a nervous disposition. What should the person do if they feel like they're about to have a nervous breakdown. He replied with a simple statement. To leave your house, find someone in need, and help them. That direction is simple, yet extremely profound. Giving during this time is especially important because of how erratic everything seems like. Some ways to practice this include:

In our world today, we are inclined to form virtual relationships. We spend a lot of time on social media and the internet in general, which prompts us to obsessively watch for how many likes or retweets we are getting. The more we do that, the less interested we become in forming relationships in person or making friends the old fashioned way. Harvard University researchers surveyed and scrutinized a group of 724 men from 1939 to 2014, and arrived at a simple, yet important conclusion. Harvard professor Robert Waldinger, director of the center conducting the study, described it this way: "Good relationships keep us happier and healthier, period." The determining factor of how happy and healthy these men were throughout their lives was the presence of good relationships. Success, where they lived, what they drove, and how smart they were didn't matter compared to successful, deep relationships. The barometer of what constitutes a "good relationship" is simply the quality of the friends you have. It doesn't matter how many friends you have or whether you are in a committed relationship. The quality and closeness of your relationships are what matters. What this means is that enjoying the benefits of an intimate and supportive relationship is equal to enjoying the benefits of your relationship with a family member, friend, or colleague. The importance of these relationships is evident in plenty of other studies. Worldwide, there is an increase in the amount of research that focuses on well-being on a national scale. Countries across the globe are beginning to look at Gross National Happiness as a measure of national health, in addition to the Gross National Product. Some of the "happiest countries in the world" include Denmark, Norway, Columbia, Israel, and Australia. When researchers asked why these specific countries were selected, the answer they discovered was that people living in the happiest countries enjoy high levels of social support. This support can be the result of deep interpersonal connections with families, intimate friendships, or a sense of communal spirit. In these countries, the emphasis is always on relationships. It may seem strange or unusual that this is where happiness comes from. However, cultivating these types of relationships isn't difficult. The difference lies between virtual and real relationships. It may seem as if relationships have transitioned onto an online platform, but the important ones are the ones that are nourished with a deep personal connection. Right now, the world is in an unsure place, since we are all under stay-at-home orders. It is difficult and not possible to go see those friends in person. However, there is still the distinction of a superficial relationship versus a deep one. It doesn't need to be practiced in person to be a meaningful relationship. We live in a current society that has lost a lot of its old structures and modalities. We need to establish some new structures and new modalities. That looks like setting time out of our day every day to check on a friend. See how a family member is doing. Reach out to someone we wouldn't normally reach out to. Get honest and vulnerable with people because right now, that is something that can benefit the world.

A necessary aspect to the recovery program is the relationship between you and a higher power. When some people first hear that they get discouraged. You may have an idea that tells you what a higher power looks like. Most people find out that the connection to nature is easier to digest. Nature can include anything from the ocean to a forest. There are studies that have shown the positive correlation between mental health and the relationship to nature. Being outside amongst nature can help ground you. Being in nature is good for the mind and the body. In some cultures it is a right of passage and requirement. Many people look to nature as a place of healing or personal growth. There have been studies conducted in search of the reason why as humans are we drawn to nature. What researchers have found is that dating back centuries, we enjoy being around beautiful, natural spaces because they are resource-rich environments. Ones that provide optimal food, shelter, and comfort. The evolutionary need explains why children are drawn to elements and natural environments. It also explains why we enjoy nature-inspired architecture. Over 100 studies have shown that being in nature, living in nature, or even viewing nature in paintings and videos can have positive impacts on the brain, bodies, feelings, thought processes, and social interactions. When we view nature or are physically in the middle of it, there is an overwhelming feeling of calmness to our nervous system. There is a cascade of positive emotion as well that occurs. Positive Emotions have many benefits in the social world. For example it increases trust, cooperation, and closeness with others. Being surrounded by nature provides you with a sense of yearning. Typically it is found that people will wonder about their purpose in life and other deeper rooted thoughts. What this provides is a sort of "soul searching". Especially if you are surrounded by an ocean or large rocks. It has been studied that being around natural creations that are much larger than the person can help you feel small and helps relieve worry. This helps you see that your problems are not actually that big and it provides a sense of security. This can help diminish obstacles between self and others. Another common find is the ability to remain still and in awe. For people who have a hard time staying still or concentrating on tasks, being in nature can help focus your attention by being completely present.

We live in a society where in this very moment many things seem uncertain. From a global pandemic to social rights movements and political rifts, there seem to be many reasons for tears in friendships and relationships. Right now is a time where as a society it is better to band together and remember what is most important. If you feel like you're struggling to make friends or keep up friendships and aren't sure why, the following may help you take a look at what the cause could be. Loneliness is a feeling that has become more common as time has passed. In 2018 a study of 20,000 Americans showcased that half of them felt left out or alone and over 25 percent of them reported they felt as if there was nobody that could understand them and felt lonely. The first is being introverted. This can be feelings of insecurity, especially when meeting new people. People that are shy experience uneasiness when put into new situations. Introverts need to recharge after being around people. People typically make them feel drained or exhausted after a lot of interaction. It can be difficult for them to interact how extroverts naturally act. Another reason is the fear of rejection. It is helpful to use fear at times to prevent you from saying something you don't mean or getting into a fight with someone. However, fear of rejection can be crippling. It limits your ability to connect with people because you're constantly worried about what they're thinking about you. This leads to feeling inadequate or less than a lot of times. Sometimes people feel like they can't be heard because they're afraid of speaking up for themselves. Another reason briefly mentioned already, is insecurity. People that feel insecure or have low self-esteem believe themselves worthless. This causes fear or worry about getting close to people because they typically feel that people don't really like them. Last reason is low trust. Some people have had a bad experience and struggle leaving that in the past. Letting people in is difficult and getting vulnerable can feel uncomfortable at times. It can cause a person to think they're too picky as well. Mostly because they have expectations of people who are impossible to meet. They may think that they are limiting their time to specific situations or people who make them comfortable. In reality they are just afraid of letting people in.

We are currently in a strange place no matter where you are located in the world. You may be feeling anxious, depressed, or unsure of what to do during this pandemic. Now that it has been prolonged and we are not completely back to normal, you may be feeling restless or irritable. Feelings of economic insecurity might be rattling in your mind consistently. However, now is the perfect time to start your recovery process and take steps towards self-improvement. Most of us have a lot of time on our hands and that can be a bad thing for our mental health.

SMART Recovery is an abstinence oriented support program that helps individuals who suffer from substance use disorders. It is helpful for some individuals to utilize this adaptation of recovery after or during treatment. Its main objective is to help you become confident and self-empowered. Your substance use disorder does not define you and in fact, SMART recovery does not use labels like "addict" or "alcoholic" to identify you. It provides global support and meetings for anyone that may be struggling with substance usage. It uses a scientific 4 point program to help you become independent of your substance usage. Their model is based on a four-point program in behavioral change. This includes, building and maintaining the motivation to change, coping with urges to use, managing thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in an effective way without addictive behaviors, and living a balanced, positive, and healthy life. The motivation they use is the awareness that we all have human problems. We don't want to experience pain and we want to experience happiness as much as possible. Our substance use minds want this, yet do not see the long term effects. We are impulsive and mainly focus on short term goals that can sabotage us in the long run.

There are many pathways to getting sober. You may find that you are not interested in joining a specific 12-step fellowship in regards to getting sober and that is okay. It is an important fact to disclose, however, that you talk about what method is best in line with where you are at in your recovery goals. Some people get to a place where they realize their relationship with substances is causing problems and they want to change their behavior. Others have a strong faith and relationship with a higher power that has helped them realize they no longer want to use substances. Whatever the case may be 12 step recovery is not the only solution or pathway in staying sober.